Some amazing things I have seen.

I was thinking today how I have seen many amazing things in this world.  I use the word "amazing" to mean both the good and the bad.  Life has taught me that the most horrendous thing I can imagine still has an element of amazement to it, but with negative effects.

I have stood at the peaks of mountains and stared at the vast expanse of the Rockies.  I have stood above the highest waterfall in America and felt the power of the water plummeting down.  I have trekked through the barrenness of an Arizona desert.  I have snorkeled one of the largest barrier reefs in the world.  I have seen the miracle of birth.  I have seen the faces of children scared by war be restored and filled with life.

I have also seen the desolation of a nation living without hope on their second hand land.  I have seen the brokenness of people fending for themselves through dishonest living.  I have witnessed the solemnness of someone's last breath.  I have seen the failed attempt of a man fighting for something worth more than earthly treasures.  I have seen the faces of children with no life in their eyes.

Quite a lot to have seen for a man of 27 years, but I give you my word it is all true.  However, there is something happening in my home right now that is more amazing than all of this that I can not see.  It is the work God is doing in my little girl's heart as she learns the painful process of being a daughter in a family committed to honesty and integrity.  Structure and security is a terrifying thing to older children who are adopted.  It requires them to lay down all the barriers they have raised to guard their hearts from pain.  Often she is unwilling to take down the barriers herself, so the only option is to sometimes break through them.  What makes the pain and hard work all worth it is the finished product, which is what we actually get to see.  Little by little I see the result of Agape giving up her orphan behaviors and becoming the person God wants her to be.  These orphan behaviors do not go gently though.  As I said this whole thing is a painful process, but overall, I'm enjoying the results.

This is important for me to think about today.  Agape did not have the best of days today.  School was cancelled due to what was supposed to be snow.  Jen and I have been fighting sinus infections for almost a week now, and Jen ended up adding an ear infection to the mix this morning.  On top of that, I just finished my 6th day straight of working today with still 2 more in front of me.  Needless to say, we did not have much patience for her attitude.  So I thank God for giving me the grace to stand when my own strength fails me.  I will put a lot of money on our fellow adoptive families knowing exactly what I'm talking about.  Let us all take time to calm down and remember why we first wanted to adopt, and the power of the God who fuels us through every step of this journey we are on.

Blessings to you all.