Today we hosted our Spaghetti Dinner at our church, and kicked off our Silent Auction as well. Needless to say, it was a blast. Unlike Pancake Breakfasts (which was also a blast), spaghetti dinners are a lot easier to hold. Not to mention cheaper to prepare for as well. I wish I could post some pictures up from it. My main job was to man the spaghetti pot and keep the supply up. Not an easy task being at a Mennonite church with an all-you-can-eat function. I felt like the Italian Stallion with my trusty Starbucks in hand. We also were able to share a 10 or 15 minute presentation giving an overview of our adoption. Basic things such as, why we're doing this, how far along we are, support needs that we have. Everything went well, and we were able to add quite a bit more to our funds. Only about $30,000 to go ... no big deal.
On a much more serious note. We got word of some very dear friends of ours who had to realize a dream of theirs would not become a reality. They are heartbroken, and Jen and I are heartbroken for them. Watching them helped me realize a little better how fragile our dreams are. At this point, it would not take much for our own dream of adoption to fall apart as well. Yet, we must remember the One who holds our dreams. He is the one who gave them to us, and He just may see fit to take them away. These friends of ours have huge hearts, and fresh ambition. I trust in time that they will be pursuing a new dream to call their own.
Thanks again for reading.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Monday, May 16, 2011
Learning how to love...
Hi Everyone!
This is finally Jen writing! First, I need to apologize for being so delinquent at this blogging thing. Dan has been doing a great job, though, I must say. I love reading the posts that he writes! But I really wanted to share with you all about the whole "stolen cell phone" ordeal, and what God has taught me through such a seemingly insignificant occurrence.
First, you must know that my cell phone is like my "brain" and I probably depend on it too much... I don't know ANYONE'S number without it, and I never know what time it is!!! So having it stolen was very personal to me, and I was very upset. Fortunately, is God's providence, He timed it so that I actually realized the phone was stolen just when I was leaving to go and cut my Dad's grass. Cutting his lawn is a 2 hour job, so I had LOTS of time to think and pray. As I was riding the mower I was telling God how frustrated and hurt I was, how I did not have time for this right now, how the money that we would have to spend on buying a new phone would make any profit from the yead sale pretty much useless, etc. I had been able to narrow it down and figure out who had done it, and I was just feeling so hurt and angry that they would do something so violating as stealing from me. I told God over and over how I just could not understand how anyone could steal... it is a desire that I cannot fathom. I would not be able to live with myself if I stole from someone else, and dishonesty is one of my biggest pet peeves. As I was telling God how I did not understand this person, I realized that I was sounding pretty self righteous... "God, I know that I could never do that..." I knew that I better be careful. Instead I starting praying "God, what do you want me to learn here... I know this is a chance for me to grow, but what are you trying to teach me?" In response, two songs kept running through my head. If you know me, you know that I LOVE music, and it is really one of the ways that I keep my heart tuned into to God. I really feel like (as Pastor Vernon says) music is the language of the soul. So God was speaking to me through this. The first song was "Learning how to Love" (check out this link for a live performance video) by the band Caleb. The song talks about how we all have broken promises, betrayed trusts, been selfish, and made mistakes, and we are all just in the process of "learning how to love." But it is just that... a PROCESS. It is amazing that God and others can love us despite ourselves but it is proof of grace. The chorus says "I've been changing, but I'm still learning how to love..." How true! The second song was "All the way to Kingdom Come" by Rich Mullins (By the way, Rich's music is one of the best sources of wisdom I've found outside of the Bible!). The chorus says:
And He gave love away like the sky gives the rain and sun
We were looking for heroes, He came looking for the lost
We were searching for glory, and He showed us a cross
Now we know what love is 'cause He loves us
All the way to kingdom come (All the way)
All the way to kingdom come"
Suddenly, I was struck with the fact that I needed to learn to give more grace. Just as I am still learning how to love, so is this person who took my phone. I have been given a great family, a solid background of growing up in Christian community, and many positive, Godly influences to guide me through the decisions and formative years of my life (and I STILL make wrong, unloving choices!). This person may not have had that. I have not lived in their skin or walked in their shoes, and so I need to remember that they are not at the same place I am. Even more, I only have the capability to love and choose rightly because I have met Jesus. I wouldn't have known what love even was without him... so maybe this "thief" has never really met him. Without God, without a source of love in our life, without learning early in life that others can be trusted, how can one learn how to be trustworthy? I need to take my focus off of judging and grumbling about fairness and blame, and just pray for this person and try to understand where they are coming from. It is a command of Jesus to pray for your enemies, after all! So, my heart has been softened, and now I just pray that one day this person comes to know the love that I have been so privileged to have been given since birth. I hope they are "learning how to love" and meet the one who "gave love a face and gave love a name." And I really am not mad anymore... maybe still annoyed at the inconvenience at times, but my heart is light and unburdened of bitterness. It feels so good. :)
But God was not done with me yet... He spoke again, and said "you know, your adopted children might have issues like these, and you need to learn how to deal with this without getting personally hurt. You need to be able to love your child even if they do this, and have grace to help them learn love." You see, some children enter an adopted family with smiles and love to give, but some enter with emotional baggage, attachment issues, anger, hurt, and a strongly ingrained drive to "fend for themselves" in any way possible. Our children may hoard food, lie, steal from us, react physically, or refuse to let us get close... at least for awhile. And while we are not necessarily expecting this, we need to be prepared for it as a possibility. We need to be ready to see our children with grace, compassion, patience, and love that is not conditional on their return of that love back to us. This brings me to the inclusion of one of my favorite words E.V.E.R. ... Agape. Agape love is the love that Jesus has for us. It is unconditional and self-sacrificial, not based on what it can get in return, and not dependent on any action of others. It is just the pure, self-sacrificial love of putting the needs and service of others at top priority, JUST BECAUSE. Beautiful. This kind of love is beautiful. The only way that we know it even exists... that it isn't just a myth... is through Jesus! I have always wanted to name my first girl Agape, and I am hoping it will be a name representing the character that she will one day grow to embody. But until then, I need to embody it for her. And one way or another, it WILL be tested. Can I do it? Can I love my kids this way when they refuse to love me? Yes, with God's help... yes. Not perfectly! But, yes. And in his wisdom, he is giving me the chance to start learning how to do this even now.
So, the long and short of it is, I am still learning how to love. Thankfully, I am learning it from the one who came to show us what it looks like. With all my heart, this is what I want to do.
Well, if you have made it all the way to the end of this, then I applaud you! Now you know why I let Dan write, LOL, because when I write it turns into a "novel"! But God is being faithful and teaching me much through this whole adoption process, fundraising, yardsale-ing, etc. As we prepare our home for our children, God is preparing our hearts. This is all part of the process of becoming parents, I suppose!
Thank you so much for your prayers and support... they are treasured by Dan and I.
Blessings,
Jen
PS Just have to give a shout-out to my incredible hubby who volunteered to give up his precious iPhone savings so that I can buy a new phone (not an iPhone... I can't handle all that new-fangled technology). He is living proof of Agape love as well, and I love him! (and I will be very thankful to have a phone again!)
This is finally Jen writing! First, I need to apologize for being so delinquent at this blogging thing. Dan has been doing a great job, though, I must say. I love reading the posts that he writes! But I really wanted to share with you all about the whole "stolen cell phone" ordeal, and what God has taught me through such a seemingly insignificant occurrence.
First, you must know that my cell phone is like my "brain" and I probably depend on it too much... I don't know ANYONE'S number without it, and I never know what time it is!!! So having it stolen was very personal to me, and I was very upset. Fortunately, is God's providence, He timed it so that I actually realized the phone was stolen just when I was leaving to go and cut my Dad's grass. Cutting his lawn is a 2 hour job, so I had LOTS of time to think and pray. As I was riding the mower I was telling God how frustrated and hurt I was, how I did not have time for this right now, how the money that we would have to spend on buying a new phone would make any profit from the yead sale pretty much useless, etc. I had been able to narrow it down and figure out who had done it, and I was just feeling so hurt and angry that they would do something so violating as stealing from me. I told God over and over how I just could not understand how anyone could steal... it is a desire that I cannot fathom. I would not be able to live with myself if I stole from someone else, and dishonesty is one of my biggest pet peeves. As I was telling God how I did not understand this person, I realized that I was sounding pretty self righteous... "God, I know that I could never do that..." I knew that I better be careful. Instead I starting praying "God, what do you want me to learn here... I know this is a chance for me to grow, but what are you trying to teach me?" In response, two songs kept running through my head. If you know me, you know that I LOVE music, and it is really one of the ways that I keep my heart tuned into to God. I really feel like (as Pastor Vernon says) music is the language of the soul. So God was speaking to me through this. The first song was "Learning how to Love" (check out this link for a live performance video) by the band Caleb. The song talks about how we all have broken promises, betrayed trusts, been selfish, and made mistakes, and we are all just in the process of "learning how to love." But it is just that... a PROCESS. It is amazing that God and others can love us despite ourselves but it is proof of grace. The chorus says "I've been changing, but I'm still learning how to love..." How true! The second song was "All the way to Kingdom Come" by Rich Mullins (By the way, Rich's music is one of the best sources of wisdom I've found outside of the Bible!). The chorus says:
"We didn't know what love was 'til He came
And He gave love a face and He gave love a nameAnd He gave love away like the sky gives the rain and sun
We were looking for heroes, He came looking for the lost
We were searching for glory, and He showed us a cross
Now we know what love is 'cause He loves us
All the way to kingdom come (All the way)
All the way to kingdom come"
Suddenly, I was struck with the fact that I needed to learn to give more grace. Just as I am still learning how to love, so is this person who took my phone. I have been given a great family, a solid background of growing up in Christian community, and many positive, Godly influences to guide me through the decisions and formative years of my life (and I STILL make wrong, unloving choices!). This person may not have had that. I have not lived in their skin or walked in their shoes, and so I need to remember that they are not at the same place I am. Even more, I only have the capability to love and choose rightly because I have met Jesus. I wouldn't have known what love even was without him... so maybe this "thief" has never really met him. Without God, without a source of love in our life, without learning early in life that others can be trusted, how can one learn how to be trustworthy? I need to take my focus off of judging and grumbling about fairness and blame, and just pray for this person and try to understand where they are coming from. It is a command of Jesus to pray for your enemies, after all! So, my heart has been softened, and now I just pray that one day this person comes to know the love that I have been so privileged to have been given since birth. I hope they are "learning how to love" and meet the one who "gave love a face and gave love a name." And I really am not mad anymore... maybe still annoyed at the inconvenience at times, but my heart is light and unburdened of bitterness. It feels so good. :)
But God was not done with me yet... He spoke again, and said "you know, your adopted children might have issues like these, and you need to learn how to deal with this without getting personally hurt. You need to be able to love your child even if they do this, and have grace to help them learn love." You see, some children enter an adopted family with smiles and love to give, but some enter with emotional baggage, attachment issues, anger, hurt, and a strongly ingrained drive to "fend for themselves" in any way possible. Our children may hoard food, lie, steal from us, react physically, or refuse to let us get close... at least for awhile. And while we are not necessarily expecting this, we need to be prepared for it as a possibility. We need to be ready to see our children with grace, compassion, patience, and love that is not conditional on their return of that love back to us. This brings me to the inclusion of one of my favorite words E.V.E.R. ... Agape. Agape love is the love that Jesus has for us. It is unconditional and self-sacrificial, not based on what it can get in return, and not dependent on any action of others. It is just the pure, self-sacrificial love of putting the needs and service of others at top priority, JUST BECAUSE. Beautiful. This kind of love is beautiful. The only way that we know it even exists... that it isn't just a myth... is through Jesus! I have always wanted to name my first girl Agape, and I am hoping it will be a name representing the character that she will one day grow to embody. But until then, I need to embody it for her. And one way or another, it WILL be tested. Can I do it? Can I love my kids this way when they refuse to love me? Yes, with God's help... yes. Not perfectly! But, yes. And in his wisdom, he is giving me the chance to start learning how to do this even now.
So, the long and short of it is, I am still learning how to love. Thankfully, I am learning it from the one who came to show us what it looks like. With all my heart, this is what I want to do.
Well, if you have made it all the way to the end of this, then I applaud you! Now you know why I let Dan write, LOL, because when I write it turns into a "novel"! But God is being faithful and teaching me much through this whole adoption process, fundraising, yardsale-ing, etc. As we prepare our home for our children, God is preparing our hearts. This is all part of the process of becoming parents, I suppose!
Thank you so much for your prayers and support... they are treasured by Dan and I.
Blessings,
Jen
PS Just have to give a shout-out to my incredible hubby who volunteered to give up his precious iPhone savings so that I can buy a new phone (not an iPhone... I can't handle all that new-fangled technology). He is living proof of Agape love as well, and I love him! (and I will be very thankful to have a phone again!)
Friday, May 13, 2011
Starting to feel a little more superstitious... (a post by Dan)
So did anyone notice the date today? That's right, Friday the 13th. Unfortunately, we haven't been able to forget it. We are holding yet another yard sale today that's been running a little slow. What's worse is that we been the victim to theft. A few minor losses of items we've noticed are gone, but haven't been sold. Even worse still is the stealing of Jen's phone. By re-tracing the events up till noticing it being missing we have the culprits narrowed down. Unfortunately we have no way of tracking them down. It is a very violating feeling when you have such personal items stolen from you. Right now someone is invading the privacy of, basically, Jen's whole life. Her contact list has people with whom she is close to on it. She has pictures of her own precious memories (nothing she would be ashamed to show people). Essentially, a piece of her is missing, and it has shaped the course of today. What was supposed to be a nice romantic night of dinner and enjoying each other's company will now be spent obtaining a new phone for Jen giving us a constant reminder of a not-so-good day. To sum it all up, this hasn't been one of our better days. But even in the midst of our hardship we still recognize God is faithful to us, and has prepared us to face this very day. We trust His sovereign control of this situation. Anyway, not the type of post we want to make a habit of sharing with you all. We consider anyone reading this blog to be very dear to us and we want to be transparent and offer you both our joys and sorrows.
So, thank you all for your loving support. We look forward to a brighter day tomorrow. Today is almost over, and we are glad that we never have to re-live it ever again.
So, thank you all for your loving support. We look forward to a brighter day tomorrow. Today is almost over, and we are glad that we never have to re-live it ever again.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Fundraising
So it's about time we begin looking into more fundraising ideas to help meet our goal. Keep your eyes out for new links and ways you can help support our adoption process. You all have already been very supportive and giving to us, and we could never thank you enough for that. Unfortunately we are still pretty far from our goal from bringing our kids home to us. We're saving up as much as we can, and we're we're asking you to continue to come along side us in our journey. Let us know if you have any great fundraising ideas. After doing many yard sales and a pancake breakfast we're willing to try anything. Thank you all once again.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Chaos...
...that's what you get when you put the Whitesel/Purks family together in one kitchen attempting to work together with a limited number of rations, and ultimately no idea what's going on. Yes, I'm talking about our pancake breakfast that we held today. As expected, God blessed our efforts with a good turnout of friends who love and support us dearly, and with the addition of some new faces that we got a chance to meet. Ignoring my cheap shot earlier Jen's family was a lot of help, and we couldn't have pulled this off without their help. Jen herself showed her true love and devotion to our children by waking up at 05:30 this morning. Anyone who knows Jen knows she still considers that time of day "night-time" and that it is reserved for sleeping only. This was truly an outward sign of how desperately she wants to see the face of our children in front of her. The breakfast itself was great. We loved seeing people come and fill up on good food. Having an all-you-can eat affair should remind us of Heaven, where no one goes hungry.
Upon returning home, and bringing our stuff from the breakfast inside to our large stack of un-washed dishes and clothes Jen comments, "Well, time to get ready for our spaghetti dinner." We can never find enough hours in the day, but todays were spent well and we thank all of you who took your own time out to help fulfill our dream of adoption. This really would not be happening without all your love and support for us. As the African proverb goes: It takes a village to raise a child. We thank you in the most sincere way possible for being our village at this time.
Notice we're getting fancy at this whole blog thing with some pictures.
Upon returning home, and bringing our stuff from the breakfast inside to our large stack of un-washed dishes and clothes Jen comments, "Well, time to get ready for our spaghetti dinner." We can never find enough hours in the day, but todays were spent well and we thank all of you who took your own time out to help fulfill our dream of adoption. This really would not be happening without all your love and support for us. As the African proverb goes: It takes a village to raise a child. We thank you in the most sincere way possible for being our village at this time.
Notice we're getting fancy at this whole blog thing with some pictures.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Watoto show in Ephrata, PA
If anyone can make it out to the Watoto Children's Choir concert on May 15 in Ephrata, PA you're in for a true time of blessing. I had mentioned Watoto in an earlier post, and had promised to write more about them. I still will, but if you're interested hearing their story from them is incredible. Their concerts are usually free (we've seen them 4 times in different locations) so I think this one will be too, but be sure to bring some money to buy a CD or authentic Ugandan bracelet. If for anything, come out and witness the sharing of ultimate hope and joy from those who have faced disparity far beyond what most of us have. We shared Watoto with a few of our friends back in March, and they were blessed beyond imagination with these guys.
Watoto continues to inspire us as we join the many in this world seeking to end the orphan crisis that plagues the most defenseless in the world. These children are living proof of the good that comes out of adoption.
The concert info is as follows:
Watoto continues to inspire us as we join the many in this world seeking to end the orphan crisis that plagues the most defenseless in the world. These children are living proof of the good that comes out of adoption.
The concert info is as follows:
| Sun, 15th May 2011 | |||
New Joy Brethren In Christ Church 35 New Joy Drive Ephrata, PA 17522 717-733-2864 6:00pm | |||
Here is a video explaining the ministry of Watoto.
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